“I can’t afford you.”
“Our company just ‘reorganized’… blah blah… uncertainty… blah blah… possible instability… blah blah…”
“I don’t want to feel like I’m buying you.”
“What about me? What do I get if I spoil you?”
“I just want to make sure I’m getting my money’s worth out of the times I see you.”
“Why does it have to be so transactional?”
“I’ve been thinking about it and I’m not sure this whole sugar thing is for me.”
“I will put that in your account this week” Later this week…. “My account has been hacked and bank is looking into it.”
If you’re a Sugar Baby, you’ve heard this or a version of it in response to asking for what you hope to receive out of the relationship.
You start with a feeling of excitement. You are engaging with a Sugar Daddy and equate that to the possibility of having additional money and a better lifestyle!
They ask you about what you want, and that’s when things hit rock bottom…. fast.
Their mouth opens.
And they say, “I can’t afford you.” Or better yet “poof” and they are gone.
I’m here to tell you that they’re lying.
Are there Sugar Daddies in the world that really truly cannot afford you? Yes, and some men are actually hiding behind the role of a Sugar Daddy to get what they want from you and aren’t really Sugar Daddies. But for that one who can afford you and still doesn’t want to give you what you want when he can.
The Sugar Daddies who are truly wealthy that you attract can actually afford you.
They have some disposable income that they can choose to spend on whatever they wish. They make choices on what to spend their money on and indulge in.
So if that’s true, why are they lying to you?
Why don’t they want to provide it to you?
Simply stated, it’s because what you want and desire is not equating to the value you’ve allowed them to perceive of you on their own.
You see, without your focused attention on creating the worth you feel like you deserve, the Sugar Daddy has no choice but to create that worth on your behalf. More often than not, they’ll get it wrong. Grossly wrong.
What’s your value? Nordstrom or Walmart
Some people say that Walmart is where you get the most value for your money. If you’ve ever shopped at Walmart you can go inside and pick up items at a fraction of the cost vs going to another store.
Why would anyone want to pay more when they can save money?
People aren’t picketing outside Nordstrom with signs that say “I can’t afford it.” No, actually, quite the opposite. Nordstrom is known for being quite expensive, but they’re known for their great service. That’s why they can charge the prices they do.
Nordstrom designed its worth very carefully. The company stated it to the world, so that the world couldn’t state it for them.
Sugar Daddies will happily provide you more for his perceived value of you. In fact, you can use the power of your value to increase his generosity.
Each and Every one of you is in the business of selling. Do you know what you are selling?
10 mistakes you may have unintentionally made when not designing your worth:
1. You didn’t figure out your ideal Sugar Daddy (the ones that will value you).
2. You didn’t create a Sugar Daddy Experience to speak to those Sugar Daddies mostly or only.
3. You let the Sugar Daddies define your worth for you. Whenever someone said they couldn’t afford you, you believed them and scrutinized your wants accordingly.
4. You base your worth and what you hope to receive out of the relationship on other Sugar Babies around you, rather than on your own value.
5. You haven’t focused on creating an amazing Sugar Daddy experience, because you spent your time seeking what you can get out of a Sugar Daddy versus positioning yourself to be the one for him.
6. You believe there is something magical about the Sugar Babies who get what they want, and a piece of that magic is something that you’re hard-pressed to obtain.
7. You feel as though what you are seeking isn’t justifiable to why a Sugar Daddy would provide what you are seeking, rather than focusing on exactly what you will actually do if someone provided you with his financial generosity (because part of you feels there aren’t enough Sugar Daddies out there to want to provide you with what you want if you didn’t label yourself a Sugar Baby).
8. Your have a list of expectations to be with you, and you can’t justify it to your potential Sugar Daddy.
9. You have Sugar Daddies who have gave you too little and they are requesting so much, and now you are getting a stampede of Sugar Daddies who are only wanting to give you little to nothing for what they are wanting in return.
10. And lastly, if a Sugar Daddy asked you for what you want, you answered them right away, losing an opportunity to discuss what they wanted (i.e. building more worth through a conversation with them).
As a result of this burning cycle of low worth, there is a sense of overwhelm and lack, rather than a sense of growth and confidence. Want a clear path toward higher worth and getting what you want?
My recommendation is to spend some time thinking about how you might be able to better establish your worth from the onset and manage Sugar Daddies Experiences. If you can align what you are offering your Sugar Daddy with greater value and your ideal Sugar Daddy, you will get what you want and hear the words “I can’t afford you” less and less.
The Lesson: “Why should a Sugar Daddy want to provide you with anything?” It’s not that they can’t afford you. They don’t want to because of how you are coming across. Your value to them is ZERO. It’s all in your approach. Your current approach isn’t working because the current mindset that you have doesn’t allow you to see what you are selling and we are all in the business of selling something to get what we want.
What things are you doing to create a preconceived value inside the minds of your Sugar Daddy? If you haven’t, what are you struggling with? Comment over on the Sugar Baby Advice and I promise to monitor the comments and reply back with some helpful advice.