Sugar Daddies: Sexual Bargaining About Condom Use

“15% of new HIV cases have been found in adults over 50. Other STDs higher too. Older men don’t like condoms but no one likes AIDS or STDs.” Dr. Ruth

“Condoms are less likely to be used in sugar daddy relationships than in other non-marital sexual partnerships…Condoms are also less likely to be used in relationships with large age differences (10 or more years) and in relationships that involve large amounts of material assistance.” Leila Darabi

Don’t let your Sugar Daddy negotiate with you about not using condoms. Receiving money (allowance) and/or presents can lead to poor judgment calls and life-altering consequences.
Sugar Daddies will try to trick you into having unprotected sex. “Condoms are uncomfortable.” “I can’t feel anything with a condom.” “I want to be closer to you.” “If you want this relationship with me, you’ll do it.” “I promise I’ll pull out in time.”

“If the condom is actually causing the guy discomfort, it means two things: he has the wrong size and/or he’s sensitive to the latex, spermicide, or other chemicals used. Fear not, there is a condom for him out there. There are many, many brands of condoms to choose from, often with silly names and/or fruit flavors. At this point, you could stock an entire Wal-Mart entirely with condom brands. (I believe there’s a brand that glows in the dark at this point.) There are many types for guys of all sizes, even those with sensitive wangs. Ask him specifically what is making him uncomfortable. If he’s legitimately uncomfortable, there are many solutions. Why not go to the store with him and pick out a brand together?”

Yes, condoms aren’t 100% effective in preventing unwanted pregnancies and STDs, but they are 100% more effective than the pull-out method. “The condom is uncomfortable” is never a good excuse. You know what is more uncomfortable? The feeling of a burning sensation when you pee.


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Comments 14

  1. Sam

    In all fairness, some older men can’t maintian an erection very long and often lose it trying to get the condom on. My SD and I have done well letting him put it in bare so he’ll stay hard, then we get the condom ready and pull it out and put it on. Then he goes back in and after a while comes into the condom. It works good for us.

    This is different than letting him go until he’s ready to cum. No man wants to pull out then, and besides it isn’t completley under his control anyway so mistakes happen. Our way avoids that risk.

    Of course we both got tested before the first time we did this anyway, and we are monagamous. Neither of us wants any diseases.

    1. Danielle

      My Daddy and I never use a condom.
      He loses his erection trying to put it on, and that just frustrates us both. We went together and got tested, then I got an Implanon implant. That was two years ago and I have never regretted it. We have a great sex life and he’s a wonderful, generous man. I would be at a much greater risk of STDs dating guys my own age. And insisiting on a condom is not the answer either. Guys have so many ways of slipping them off without you knowing it. I’ve caught several of them. My Daddy puts it in me bare, but at least I know what I am getting.

      1. Post
        Taylor Jones

        I’m glad that it worked out for you and it was what you wanted. STD’s is a serious issue and puts a lot of people at risk when they just take the word of their partner, but you on the other-hand got tested together and more people should do that. I do find a lot of Sugar Daddies do not want to use condoms and they have frequent partners and a Sugar Baby should be focused on her health at all times, because in the scope of things…somethings aren’t worth bargaining for.

      2. Marcie

        I took your advice and it worked out great for me and my Daddy too.

  2. Halle

    I am a 19 year old sugar baby. My daddy and I started out using condoms, but he had trouble keeping an erection in them. We got tested and stopped using them. Its much better for both of us now.

    One thing I want to mention that people who insist on condoms forget. The reality is, if your daddy can’t enjoy sex with you he isn’t going to stay. At the least he’s going to end up cheating.

    If you are going to be a sugar baby, and you’ve found a really good daddy, you need to be willing to do what it takes to keep him. Be smart, but don’t think there’s no way to be safe except condoms.

    1. Post
      Taylor Jones


      I’m glad that your relationship worked for you. This is a tough topic. But my #1 safety is me and I won’t compromise on going after what I want to have a relationship without condoms to jeopardize my life even if he is the perfect Sugar Daddy. It’s just not worth it to me. There are non-negotiables when it comes to my health.

      And that Sugar Daddy who seeks out another Sugar Baby such as yourself in which I insisted on condoms and you didn’t than that relationship was worth it to you. And there will always be another Sugar Baby there such as yourself who will embark on that relationship because I passed. But there are more men out there. I’m just not going to give up my health for a lifestyle.

      Sure, you will run into someone who such as your SD had issues with it. And just like you after using it and both getting tested you decided not to use them because you wanted that relationship. Would you have done it right from the beginning? Because now you just associated a cost to what it would be worth to you. Nothing wrong with that. If a woman is going to be a Sugar Baby and found a good Sugar Daddy and the issue comes down to condoms. Well, it’s not the right relationship for regardless if he is a “Good Daddy”. A Sugar Baby shouldn’t fear losing out on a Sugar Daddy because of condoms. She is thinking about her health and that is worth it to her.

      If it’s not right for her, it’s not right. And that is okay. Not all money is good money based on what you have to do to get it. She values her health more than that relationship which isn’t guaranteed and getting an STD will be around long after the relationship. Even getting tested doesn’t prevent.

      A Sugar Baby should be SMART in terms of thinking about how she is cultivating the right relationships for her and not building the foundation of the relationship centered around sex because now she is a commodity and will be treated as such. Sex doesn’t keep the relationship together. If you are trading yourself sexual than that is the relationship.

      1. Linda

        Taylor, I totally agree with you. I have faced that situation. I met a wonderful sugar daddy , but when it came to the intimacy part, he told me he could not use condoms. I thought about it and I was really tempted. He was a multi millionaire. Very generous. He was giving me a lot of money only to meet him 2 or 3 times a month, more than what I make working my full time job. Plus gifts, paying for my school, traveling with me. He offered to help me through my school for the next 2 years. He was just the perfect sugar daddy.
        To be truthful, I needed the money. I was not making much at my job and I had lot of debts. He told me he was clean, did not have any STD. But still, I refused to have unprotected sex with him. The relationship with him ended. I was really sad because I lost a very generous man who was willing to help me.
        But I think I made the right decision. I don’t want to take a risk of having STDs or HIV because I need the money. Even getting tested is not the best option for me. Because, most of the sugar daddies have more than 1 sugar baby. And even after getting tested, he can still get an STD or HIV from his other sugar baby and transmit it to me. HIV is a very bad disease that has no cure. My life is more important than the money. I prefer to be poor but without HIV, than having a lot of money from my sugar daddy and being infected with HIV.
        Thanks for your comments

        1. Halle

          There are NO GUARANTEES. Even if a guy agrees to use a condom there are plenty of ways for him to slip it off and give you an STD if he has one. Also, some STDS (notably herpes) are readily transmissible even though you use a condom correctly. Bottom line, go together and get tested. The tests don’t lie, and they are far more reliable than a condom. If your daddy has more than one baby you should not be with him in the first place.

          Bottom line–countless girls get pregnant and or infected with HIV or other diseases even though they insisted on a condom. Condoms just give you a false sense of security. There is just no substitute for using your head.

        2. Candy

          I feel you girl, we have on the same situation. My sugar daddy just arrived last week. He, supports me financially for my study. Its not enough but, i trying to budget it to fit on my lifestyle. The opposite is, im in a toxic relationship. He’s very arrogant,prideful, and dominant in a bad way. I diddnt had sex contact with him for 1year. Now, he wAnted to sex with me without protection. I told him, we need to use condom for safe and protection, but he refused it and get mad at me, he even shouted at me, i tried to explain to him but he’s very close minded into it. At the end he agreed to use . We had only one sex . I supossed to meet him yesterday but he doensnt response. Today he just replied that hes already in the airport and hes busy. And im so frustated that he didnt give me anything. I understand the fact that the older like them needs SEX. But they dont understand whats is the risk of unprotected sex.

          Why i started to refuse to have unprotected sex? Because ive been educated to protected sex and the risk of having HIV/AIDS. Secondly, i had 1 friend who died in aids, 2 HIV friend That still alive. Does it make sense? I can’t risk my health/life just for money. Just so sad because im in need right now. By the way i have my monthly test for hiv. Even im negative, i still worried sometimes, if i may get it or shown it in the end.

  3. Marolincat

    Condoms are smart it shows your daddy you value your health and his. If he can’t keep it up in a condom he can pop viagra! I went to a local porn shop and told the clerk that I am highly allergic to latex condoms and what I was looking for, he was extremely helpful. He also recommend an AMAZING lube that I could use with polyurethane or polyisoprene condoms, it works wonders. It’s called pjur. I also recommend switching between polyisoprene and the polyurethane condoms to keep you body from getting immune to the condoms and irritation from starting again. There is also lambskin condoms, but they don’t protect you or him from hpv. Test or no test your daddy could get something after his test, and hiv takes up to 3 months to detect. No amount of money is worth risking my life. Be safe!

  4. Sammie

    So use condoms for oral sex too? Is it weird that I’ve honestly never heard of this? Just use the regular ones?

  5. Erwin

    Look. Condoms are the most pathetic invention by man. They are a 100% deal breaker. I quickly sniff out if the SB is 100% condom anal. At that moment i quickly escort her out the door and ghost her for life. There are PLENTY of SB who despite condoms b.c it feels fake. I am 42 and never knocked up a girl. I am clean too. I refuse to have sex with a condom b/c it’s not sex. Masterbation is much more satisfactory.

    1. Post
      Taylor Jones

      From what I gather that is an area that you feel strongly about. And it should be if that is what you prefer. Anyone can say they are clean. If your SB asked that both of you get tested together. Would you?

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